


My Shame Alone

by I_Dream_Of_Camaros



Category: Reign (TV)
Genre: Crying, Drunk love confession, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Forbidden Love, Guilt, Half-Sibling Incest, Hugs, I'm Going to Hell, I'm Sorry, M/M, Self-Hatred, Shame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-23
Updated: 2017-02-23
Packaged: 2018-09-26 11:59:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9895544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_Dream_Of_Camaros/pseuds/I_Dream_Of_Camaros
Summary: After the death of King Henry,  Bash comes home. He and Francis grieve in private, but, Bash takes this time to tell Francis something important.





	

Francis sat alone in his room. The fire roared and he was enjoying a fine, aged wine. His thoughts drifting to the death of his father. He would be missing his father dearly, but at the same time it was a blessing in disguise.

Henry's madness had been destroying lives and common sense. But now, Francis was king. He didn't want this. He wasn't ready for any of this.

There was a light knock on the door. Francis sighed, thinking it was Mary.

"Come in." He called.

"I hope I'm not disturbing you."

Francis turned and saw Bash standing there. He shook his head and offered a smile.

"What can I do for you?" Francis asked.

Bash came and sat down. He nervously played with the hem of his tunic. "Francis... " He started.

Francis stared at Bash worried. "Yes?" He prompted.

"Have you ever... needed to do something... but were scared of how things would end up?" Bash finally said.

"Sometimes you have to damn the consequences. What is this all about?" Francis asked, laughing slightly.

Bash got to his feet and began to pace the length of the room.

"Father's death got me thinking. Our lives are so short. So worthless. We think we have all the time in the world but we really don't. Any minute one of us could die." Bash ranted.

Francis got to his feet and went over to Bash. He places a shoulder on the other man's shoulder.

"Sebastian. Are you alright?" Francis asked worriedly.

Bash stared at Francis for a brief moment before pulling him into a hug. Francis was startled but he wrapped his arms around Bash. He could smell the liquor on the man.

"Bash. You need to go get rest. You're drunk." Francis said softly.

Bash pulled from the embrace but kept his hand on Francis back. He shook his head.

"I came here to do something and I am going to do it." Bash said sternly.

"What are you-" Francis was cut off by Bash kissing him roughly.

Francis pushed him away startled. He saw tears forming in Bash's eyes.

"I'm sorry, Francis. God, God, I can't help it. I have tried everything to stop feeling this way. I love you. I'm sick and I hate myself. I am so sorry." Bash sobbed.

Francis gently pulled Bash into a embrace. "Shh. It's alright, Sebastian."

Bash sobbed into Francis' s shoulder. "Why don't you hate me?" He whispered.

"Why should I? You haven't done a thing worthy of hate." Francis said, softly.

"Please. Don't lie. Tell me you hate me. Tell me how you wished me dead. That I'm sick and worthless and deserve to rot in Hell. Please, hate me. Hate me." Bash sobbed, his fist clenching in the fabric of Francis tunic.

"Sebastian. Stop. I don't hate you. I never could hate you. I love you." Francis soothed.

"Not in the way I love you. Don't you understand? I want you." Bash snapped, pushing away from Francis.

"Do you really think I love Mary? Or Lola? Or any woman? It's an act, Sebastian. I have never wanted women. But a man loving a man is forbidden. It's looked down upon. I do what is best for my country." Francis confessed.

Bash looked at Francis, his eyes wide. "You don't....women?" He asked softly.

Francis shook his head. "No. I never have and I never will."

"Still...I'm your brother. I am a sick person to want you like that. I deserve to die." Bash croaked.

"Don't you ever say that! You do not deserve to die. You are not sick either. It's alright, Bash. It's alright. " Francis said sternly.

Francis walked over and placed his hands on either side of Bash's face. He gently kissed Bash's lips.

"I told you I loved you." He whispered.

Bash's face colored with realization. He kissed Francis back, shoving him onto the bed. *************************************************

It was nearly midnight when Mary went to her and Francis's room. She had spent the day with her friends and comforting Catherine.

She gently opened and closed the door, not wanting to waken Francis. As she entered the room, her candle burning bright aganist the darkness, she noticed another figure in the bed next to Francis.

Her heart dropped to her stomach when she noticed the discarded clothes around the bed. She inched closer to the bed and gasped.

Mary had been expecting a maid or a low lady. Not Bash. Anyone but Bash. She quickly but quietly left the room.

The image of her husband tangled up in the sheets with his half-brother burned in her mind.

She was going to be sick.

**Author's Note:**

> I am a terrible person.


End file.
